A little tri, a coach, & 90 days to Ironman Choo!

The days immediately following my gloriously wonderfully exhilarating half-ironman finish were all that--- glorious & wonderful... And painful. I had a huge blister on the ball of my foot which made walking difficult, and I was, simply put, exhausted. A few days off work and then life returned to normal.... With a new bumper sticker of course.

It didn't take a mathematician to know that a 9 hour half-ironman x 2 does not = 16.5 hour cutoff for the full ironman. So  after discussing it with the hubs, I decided to drop out of the full ironman in September. Yes, I had spent nearly 800 dollars to register; no I can't get a refund... But, fact is, it would be impossible to make that kind of improvement in just one summer. So, I announced on fb to my friends that I wouldn't be moving on with the training for the full ironman. Instead I would work on weight loss, and getting my half ironman faster. Yes. That was the new plan. Which was ok. Except it wasn't.

I felt a little lost. With no long bike rides or runs, or rivers to conquer, what to do?

A little exercise here and there, but overall too much food and too little movement and zero drive or motivation.

About 2 weeks after the half-ironman, I decided to register for the Mach Tenn sprint triathlon. Simply paying the money and clicking the "submit" button was just what I needed to once again get moving consistently. 

I had one week to swim, bike and run to get ready for the triathlon.

The Mach Tenn triathlon was awesome! It was a gorgeous day, a beautiful venue. The swim was 0.7 mile swim, 15 mile bike and 4 mile run. My swim, as expected, was slow at 30 minutes. It was my fastest bike ever with a pace of 15.2 mph. The run? Well, I think it was 1:03 so just under 16 min miles which is typical. At least I ran a little bit of it-- unlike my 13.1 mile walk at the half-ironman. The thing I will always remember about Mach Tenn tri is that I loved it. As I was "running" I saw triathletes encouraging each other, encouraging me, and I encouraged others. I love triathlon. Who cares if I'm slow. I love love love love triathlon! It makes me happy and makes me feel good. I knew, out there on that rolling run course that morning, that I had made a decision...... (Wait. It's coming.)

After the triathlon Tony and I packed up and headed home. I was on a high! I had received 3rd place in Athena! Yes yes, there were only 3 of us in that category... Sigh... But so what! My happiness and newfound reminder of how much I love triathlon was only dampened slightly the next day when I realized that I was DFL overall. (DFL-- dead $&%# last)

So. Moving on...

I talked with the hubs. And we talked and we talked. And then we talked some more. And we made some compromises. Oh wait-- I need to back up. A week or so after the half-ironman, a local very experienced triathlete who I greatly respect, sent me a private message and told me to go ahead and try the full. He said since I can't get my money back, may as well start and see how far I can get. At least I will get the experience. I kept mulling that over in my mind.... 

So the hubs and I talked. And we biked a few times until he declared biking absurd and has retired to only running with me :-)

And we made the decision-- ok so I made the decision-- but it was with his blessing (ok, maybe just support), to move forward with training for the full Ironman Chattanooga in September.

Yes!!!!!

The first thing I did was hire a coach. I'm fortunate to be working with Meredith Atwood, aka Swimbikemom. I first found her blog by accident in February 2013. I've been a loyal groupie ever since-- following her journey, buying all the Swimbikemom gear, etc. Last year Meredith got her USAT coaching certificate. She's going to be a great coach because she has the experience of doing 2 ironman (with her 3rd coming up in a few weeks), and yet she has had her own struggle with weight and self doubt. She understands my brain. I will never forget the first time I met her in 2013 at the Acworth GA Women's Triathlon. It was like meeting a movie star!

So! I think that's about it. I have a coach who tells me what to do each day, and for the most part, I'm doing what she says. I'm learning to walk fast since clearly I walk a lot of the "run" in a triathlon. Two days a week I speed walk and two days I run. Plus bike, and swim.

I'm eating better too, and seeing some weight loss. I'm very close to weighing less than I've weighed in 20 years. Which is a huge deal for me!

So. 90 days. 90 days until Ironman Choo.  I have a lot of work to do to be ready. And I might not finish. But I'll do my best, and I will have fun. And really, isn't that what triathlon is all about anyways? Doing our best and enjoying the opportunity and blessing of swimming, biking and running.

Ironman Chattanooga 70.3 Race Report

I still can't believe I finished a half-ironman! I powered my body (slowly) for 70.3 miles! What a miracle.

Here are my splits:

Swim 1.2 miles: 53:32

 T1: 8:25

Bike 56 miles: 3:49:23

T2: 6:28

Run 13.1 miles: 4:01:31

Total time: 8:59:19

Yes it's slow but I don't even care! Ok, yes I do. But this is a happy race report. So I will stay positive and remember to be grateful. The slow time merely fuels my drive for the next triathlon. I know where I need to improve. It truly was, one of the best days of my life. So settle in for a long race report. Seriously, grab a coffee. I'm long-winded 😊.

The Check-in

Friday found me at Ironman Village, checking in with all the other athletes.  It really was an amazing afternoon. Somewhat surreal. I spent plenty of money on Ironman tshirts, hoodies, duffle bags, coffee mugs, etc. Also attended an athlete briefing. During that meeting they went over the cutoffs for the race. My friend Deleslyn was kind enough to jot them down:

I studied that hand closely. I neded to be at mile 30 on the bike by 11:15am, off the bike by 1:00 and starting the second loop of the run by 2:45pm.

Then I went home. The remainder of Friday and Saturday consisted of relaxing, sleeping, and being a nervous wreck. On Saturday afternoon Tony and I went and checked in my bike at the mandatory bike check-in. Somehow, seeing my friends I had trained with, and racking my bike, helped alleviate the anxiety and actually gave me some excitement. After getting the bike racked it was time to go home and chill.

The Swim

I woke up at 3:30am on race morning, altho I had been awake multiple times during the night. By 4:00 we were on the road. Arriving to transition at 4:40am, I aired up my tires, placed my 4 bottles of pre-mixed carb drink on my bike, then set out my bike shoes, helmet, and run gear.

After checking and double checking, I left transition. Tony walked me to the bus where I would be transported to the swim start. A quick kiss goodbye and a prayer for safety, and I was off. I later found out Tony went back to the car, and went to sleep for a couple hours.

On arrival to the swim start, I had run into a training partner -- Michael, so we hung together and found our place in line. I'd say we were easily within the first hundred in line. The swim start was a "rolling start" which means first come first serve. I wanted to be entering the water early so I would have more time throughout the day, since the finish line would close 8.5 hours after the last swimmer entered the water. I figured if I started 45 minutes before the last swimmer, I would have 9 hours and 15 minutes to finish the race.

   The 2 hours in the swim line was spent chatting with others, a long walk to the porta-potty, eating a bagel, drinking water...and saying hi to everyone I saw along the way. The excitement was electric. 

   Soon it was time to begin. I was able to watch the pro triathletes start their swims. And then we all began to file down the ramp to the dock. Swim cap on, goggles on, wetsuit secure. Omg. Suddenly it was my turn to walk out on the dock. I was waiting for someone to say "go!" But nobody said that. I guess I was just supposed to know it was time to jump in and go! And so I did. Now, I had been taught by several experienced triathletes during my practice swims, to get in and get acclimated to the water. Slow down the heart rate, slow down the breathing... Then begin. Well, it was impossible to do that when 2,500 people are jumping in behind me. So I began to swim a few strokes with my head above water, and then when I was off to the side I stopped for a second or two and collected my bearings a bit. Then it was time to swim. The 350 meters upstream did not feel hard to me-- I couldn't "feel" the current. However, when I looked at my watch as I made the turn to head downstream, I realized it had really slowed me down. It took me 14 minutes to go upstream and crossing the channel. Well shoot. My hopes of a 50 minute swim were dashed. And so I began the downstream mile long swim. I was pleased and happy with my swim. I didn't stop, which for me was a major accomplishment! I didn't even flip into my back like I had done in practice swims. I just kept going. I did have several people swim into my feet but that was the worst that happened. Happy to say I was never kicked in the head. It was, truly, a lovely swim for me. In fact, perhaps the swim is now my favorite part of triathlon. Before I knew it, I was at the exit. The volunteer on the stairs was wonderful. She told

me to swim all the way to her because  she was at the first step. Very very helpful. And soon I was up out of the water and headed to my husband who was volunteering as a wetsuit stripper. That entire process of removing the wetsuit is about the most humiliating event ever! Lay your fat arse on the ground while we strip off your wetsuit. Oh well. Nothing modest or dignifying about triathlon and spandex anyways.... So! Swim was done! Quick happy tearful smooch to my husband and I was headed to the bike!

   This was huge. HUGE!!! Just 2.5 weeks earlier I had freaked out in the open water. Such progress with only 4 additional practices in the river. My first goal for the day-- to finish the swim alive, was met! And the 53 minutes was icing on the cake! Yes!

The Bike

Evidently I was in transition for 8 minutes and I hardly remember it. Socks, bike shoes, hairband, helmet, gloves, sunglasses, stuff Huma Gels in my pockets, and I was off. The first few miles through downtown were uneventful. Riding thru St. Elmo intrigues me because it's part historic and part run-down. I was surrounded by plenty of cyclists who were passing me at high speed.... Oh! I was pedaling down Tennessee Ave when I noticed a poster on a telephone pole that said "Go Debbie Fine! Ironman!" I laughed right out loud. How thoughtful! That made my day!

Soon we were crossing into Georgia. And soon it started to rain. Let me say that I was told by many experienced triathletes to train and practice riding in the rain because it could rain on race day... Well, I didn't follow that advice. And here it was, raining on race day. Fortunately it never thundered nor was there lightning. Turns out that the rain for 25 miles was actually quite refreshing. 

Miles 10-20 were rolling and on my training ride I remember working hard to get up some of those hills. On race day, I don't remember the struggle. I'm certain I struggled up, but like childbirth, evidently you don't remember the pain :-)

Mile 26 was Andrews Lane-- a big arse hill. It was too steep to pull my weight up, so I unclipped and walked up the hill. I had no shame. I used the walk uphill to change out my fuel bottles and to drink. It was part of my plan.  The next 15 miles was mostly flat and fun. I actually passed a few people during that section. After being passed by probably 2,300 people, I was so excited to be passing someone that I actually said out loud "I can't believe I'm passing someone!" Hope that person didn't hear me. Lol. It was a high moment haha.

I knew mile 41-44 was a long slow upgrade. And I was tired but at least I knew what to expect. I just kept spinning easy although I did walk up again the last part of the hill. Oh, the aid stations were at mile 15, 30 and 45. At the first two I tried to "catch" a water bottle and missed. So at the last one I pulled over and finally was able to get a water bottle successfully. A quick break- and then mile 45-56 I think was all downhill. Not really. Mostly. Once turning north on 193 was a mental high point because I felt like I was on the home stretch. And finally crossing into Tenmessee again with only 7 miles left was also super empowering.

Overall I felt really good on the bike. My goal was 4 hours-- which would be a 14 mph average. I knew that walking two hills would slow down my average speed. I was super excited to realize I was going to finish ahead of my 4 hour goal. I finished in 3:49 with an average pace of 14.6 mph which for this obese gal was a major score! It was my fastest pace for a long bike ride that I've had yet. With the rain, and walking the hills, I was thrilled. Rolling into transition was the best feeling ever!! I had completed the swim and the bike with time to spare-- and I felt good! 

The Run

This is where it all fell apart. I started the run with a walk, and I'm sad to say I just kept walking. For 13.1 miles. So what happened? I realize I'm not a fast runner, but I've completed 4 half-marathons in the last 18 months and I always ran at least 7-8 miles of the 13.... I'm not sure why I felt so good on the bike and so incapable of running the run.

    So I walked. In retrospect, I don't think I expected to finish the run. I was tired. Very tired. Not sick, or weak, or faint- in fact I never once had any of those issues- just tired. So I walked. Two friends had told me to not quit no matter what. Keep moving forward, as my hero Swimbikemom says. So I walked. I expected the race would end while I was walking the run and they would pull my timing chip from my ankle and tell me to go home and try again next year. And actually, I would have been ok with that. My goal earlier in the day was to finish the swim and the bike. When I completed the swim and bike with time to spare, I was already a winner. So I kept walking.

The 13.1 mile run course was two loops. So between miles 1-6 I saw so many friends who were on their second loop. It was so encouraging to see my training partners and other triathlete friends. My son Jason met me on Veterans Bridge and walked beside me for a large portion of the course when we were on the bridges. My husband and stepson and his wife were all on the Walnut St. Bridge with me as well. And so I kept walking. Felt good. Just didn't feel like running.

I knew that all triathletes had to be starting the second loop by 2:45pm. When I started the second loop it was 2:10. Wow!!! For the first time that day- I knew I could finish. If I maintained an 18 minute mile for 6.5 more miles, I would cross the finish line! So, I walked a little faster! In fact, when I saw the photographer I even ran for a few yards for the pic of course!

Admittedly, miles 7-12 were empty-- only a few slow ones out there. I had the privilege of meeting up with Ken Radley, an ironman who has done much for the triathlon community in Chattanooga. We walked several miles together on the last loop. I hydrated at every aid station. There were aid stations every mile, and at each one I took water, Gatorade, and ice sponges to stick down my bra, in my hat, behind my neck and you get the idea... It was hot. By afternoon the sun had come out. It occurred to me around mile 7 that I hadn't peed since the "obligatory" pee in the river. That was 8 hours ago. I knew I had taken in 80oz of fluid on the bike, plus liquid at each mile-- at least 10 oz each mile... Evidently I was sweating it all out. Finally at mile 10, I peed. I was happy. Onward.

Also about mile 10 I began to have pain in my right foot. I knew a blister was forming. My socks had been soaking wet from all the rain on the bike ride, and I didn't bring a dry pair to change into. So yes, I wasn't shocked to realize I was going to be miserable with blisters. Otherwise, I felt good. I wasn't ever sick or weak or anything. Obviously because I was only walking. I think the folks who really push themselves are the ones who get sick. I don't know. All I knew was that I felt fine, just wore slap out. Miles 7-9 I thought this entire idea was stupid. Why would anyone want to do this????

By mile 11, I  was focused on finishing. As I approached the finish chute, my step son Josh and son Jimmy were waiting for me and walked with  me towards the chute. As I approached the chute I decided we'll surely I can run. So I started to run. Soon I heard cheers of "Debbie!!!!!" You couldn't wipe the smile off my face. One of my happiest moments ever! Then I saw my niece Stacey, and triathlete friends David, Deleslyn, Danielle,  Dewayne, Stephanie, and Tim... Hugs and high-fives all the way up the finish chute. I was doing it. I was truly finishing my first half-ironman!!! 70.3 amazing glorious miles!!!!!!

It was, honestly, the best feeling in the world. They say triathlon is addicting. And now I know why. It's that darn finish line experience! 

My finish time was 8:59. So "technically" I did not finish. On the ironman.com race results I am listed as a DNF --Did Not Finish. That because Ironman gives you 8.5 hours to complete the race and I took almost 9 hours. However, if you cross the line while it's still open, you get a medal. Which is more important to me anyways.

In my mind, I finished. I went the distance. I love triathlon. I will be back. I will make 8.5 hours next time. So it's ok. And, when I do get in better shape and get faster, it will never be as special as this first half-ironman. Nothing will ever top this experience. Except maybe a full ironman:-)

This concludes my race report. It was an incredible day, and honestly I wasn't sure I would finish. But I did. Thankyou to all my friends and family who helped me get where I am today. Most especially I want to thank my husband. The training hasn't been easy on the marriage. It is hard to balance full time career, family and ironman.My heart is grateful.

Now, what's next? Oh, another half-ironman in October! Yes, I paid and am registered for the full ironman in September, but many long talks with my husband and I have decided to focus on weight loss and getting faster at the 70.3 miles before I take on 140.6 miles. And that's ok. I'll do some shorter distance tris this summer for fun, and toe the start line at Beach 2 Battleship half-ironman distance in Wilmington NC on Octboer 17. Hopefully leaner and faster. I truly do love swimming, biking and running. Walking. Whatever :-)

Fear

The excitement of signing up for Ironman Chattanooga is beginning to die down, now that I have hired a coach. Now the primary emotion I feel is fear. Oh, and sleepiness. Is that an emotion? 

   I have a lot of endurance to build, and speed as well, because I'm not fast. Which leads to the weight loss I need to shed, which will to a great extent help my speed.

    Today is my 7th day in a row at work, so I know I'm just tired in general. I think I'll be ok. Just need some sleep. 

   Oh, and the scale. The stinking scale. I haven't been on the scale since September 7, and I am terrified to get on it. What if I haven't lost much weight? What if being sugar and flour free hasn't helped at all? How can an intelligent person have such a fear and anxiety over a little machine on the bathroom floor? Because for 46 years my self esteem has been tied to my weight, obviously.one day soon, I will get on the scale. Oh, I also start swim lessons this week. That's all I have for now.

Ironman Chattanooga 2014 & 2015

Wow there is so much to update about! The best two things I've experienced recently are: becoming sugar and flour free, and the Little Debbie Ironman Chattanooga. I'll blog about the sugar free thing in a separate post. 

   Volunteering and spectating the Ironman triathlon was an amazing experience. It was also very inspiring. Watching those athletes cross the finish line after 13-16.5 hours of swimming, biking and running was amazing. Congrats to all the triathletes who trained hard all year and crossed the finish line.

So. What would be perhaps the dumbest and illogical thing to do 2 days after such an emotional and inspiring day? Why, sign up for the 2015 Ironman, of course. So now I'm invested. Ironman isn't cheap. I am really invested! But, my boys and husband are supportive and I have a few good friends who are going to train with me, as well as coaches lined up. I can toe the start like next September 27 only if I work out harder this year than I ever have. My only hope of finishing by midnight is if I lose a LOT of weight, and build tons if endurance and some speed as well. 

    One day at a time, my journey to Ironman has commenced.

Goals goals goals

September 1, 2014:

So I in July I joined a Facebook page to walk/run 100 miles in a month. I didn't make it, but it was still motivating. I liked having a goal. Since I was also swimming and biking, I figured it was nearly impossible to get 100 miles on feet. So, for August I set the following goals:

Run/walk 60 miles

Swim 10,000 yards

Bike 100 miles

Lose 8 lbs 

 

Drum roll please....

I didn't reach it. Here's what my month looked like:

Ran/walk 52 miles

Swam 5,000 yards

Biked---0.  Zero!!!

Weight-- afraid of scales.

I know that compared to most of America, that was pretty good. Except I don't want to be like most of America. I want to do stupid triathlons. Why? Because they are fun, and exhilarating. Because when I cross a finish line, I feel invincible! It's a euphoric feeling that I just don't get when I'm on the couch eating nachos. Or in the car stopping at Baskin Robbins' drive thru.

Ah, this bipolar exercise/nutrition self. You can trust me with your life, and I would never steal a Percocet, but don't leave me alone with a cupcake. 

Naturally it's easy and fun and narcissistic to post in Facebook when I nail the early morning swims or the long runs in the afternoon. Not nearly as much fun to post about the Taco Bell on the way home from work, or the fact that I skipped my run to lay on the couch and watch Breaking Bad (yes, I'm a year behind everyone).

So, it's only logical to keep the same goals for September. They are not hard goals. But I have to be consistent. The hardest things for me are: obviously, eating right, and exercising on the last days of my rotation at work. This past week I exercised days 1-3, and was lazy days 4-6. Today, day 7, I'm headed to the pool, to get my first swim of the month in.

It's a journey-- and I find I enjoy the journey more when I show up for swimming, biking or running.

So in September, I will reach the exercise goals. And my weight loss goal? Only a few pounds.

To see 258 or less. (Now that took a LOT of raw honesty.)

Winter time blues and ice cream

Well, this photo sums it up:

Hahaha. I still laugh every time I see it. I sooo wish it didn't represent the last 4 months. To be quite honest, it's been a rough 4 months. As graduation from the nurse practitioner program approached, I went into full burn-out mode on diet and exercise. I quit going to my trainer, and I only ran maybe 1-2x week. But, graduation was still a highlight of my life, nonetheless.

Aren't my guys adorable? 

So fast forward to January and February. My days were filled with working full time in the ICU, studying for board exams, and applying for nurse practitioner jobs. February 5 is a highlight because I passed boards and am now a licensed and certified Adult-Gerontology Acute Care Nurse Practitioner! Yeah! Unfortunately the job search was dismal and slow. My dream of working as a hospitalist was fading quick because there weren't any openings here locally. 

The exercise just ebbed and flowed, but the eating was horrific and yet all I wanted to do was eat some more. 

Anyways..... Last week a dream came true and 5:00pm, when I received a job offer to work on the hospitalist team at the county hospital!!! Yes!! I was fortunate to do a few months of clinicals there last year and I loved it. So, my heart is overjoyed and so very, very thankful. I have my employee physical this week and should be finding out a start date soon. Yeah!!

That said, while the job thing is settled, now I'm left with a body that has gained 17 lbs, and geez I wasn't even anywhere near goal. It's time to start again. again. AGAIN.  Sadly I've lost my desire for triathlon. Ok, maybe haven't fully lost it, but it's not what it was last year. Last year I was disciplined and motivated and this year I'm 100% blah...

Then, the other day I read about a lady who lost 100 lbs and her motto was "every damn day". Every damn day she exercised. And it just resonated with me. Every damn day. I actually wrote to her because I think we need a FB group by that name. 

So... Lastly, l am registered for a half-marathon this coming weekend.  I'm not sure I can do it. I did a half-marathon last month and it was exhausting. The most I've done the last 2 weeks is 9 miles,

6 miles and 4-5 miles. So we will see. I do long to be motivated again to be strong and fit. But the struggle with food is so overwhelming at times. 

When I run or bike, or swim, I have moments of joy and I know for sure it's what I want to do--- be active, healthy and strong. And then there are moments when all I want to do is eat ice cream and play on my iPhone.

Can you relate to this struggle? How do you deal with it? What do you turn to when tired or depressed? 

Wagons were meant for falling off of

Several things swirling thru my mind this morning. Should I start with the happy or or the hopeless? Ha. Yes, yes, yes, I have completed the requirements for my Masters degree in nursing. The only thing I lack is the nursing dedication next Tuesday and then graduation on Wednesday. So happy, so proud, so honored, so blessed. 

That said, now let's talk about the ongoing life-long struggle with food and weight and self esteem. 

When I finished my first half-marathon in October, I felt a little lost afterwards. With no immediate goal to work towards, my exercise began to fall apart. Or at least the purpose for it did. Then one fateful day (the day before Thanksgiving), I bent over to pick a pair of jeans up off the floor (housework is risky!), and felt a pop in my back. Immediately my back seized up and I could hardly move. Oh no.....  I'm not sure what made me cry-- the pain? No, I think the tears came because I knew I had just lost the ability to exercise for a while. Ugh. Took some Advil, grabbed an ice pack and went to bed.

And that was 2.5 weeks ago. I haven't run for nearly 3 weeks! Haven't biked! I did swim a few times but even that was 10 days ago. Oh em gee. My coach would send me my workout schedule regardless, accommodating the back pain, telling me to walk in the pool or use the elliptical instead of running, but do SOMETHING. With my comprehensive exam at school last week, I told my coach that I was taking time off. It sounded responsible. 

It. Sounded. Lazy.

And with the lack of exercise, and the sore back (which, while it still aches at times, is far more discouraging than it is painful), and the finishing of grad school, the food fell apart. 

Well, kinda.  

See, I would start each morning like this:

This is a work breakfast. But you get the point. Lunch was always pretty good too. 

And then every day around 3-4pm my food would fall apart. This is how it fell apart yesterday, thanks to the Nephrology docs (kidney specialists) who obviously want me to become diabetic and develop renal failure to keep them in business. :-)

Ah yes. So the best weight I've seen is 233.3 and the weight today is 239.5

Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!! Truly I feel like this:

So I suppose this blog post is completely pointless, except to whine and celebrate. Pleasantly and pathetically bipolar. Yeah! I've finished my Masters degree! A dream come true!!! Boo! I'm gaining weight and my back hurts! Please, someone pass me a Prozac and throw my butt on a treadmill. 

I won't give up. You know why? Because I love love love love how I feel when I exercise. I've told my coach that I'm ready to kick it back in gear starting on Monday. And, I might just jump on the spin bike today, because why wait until Monday? 

And I will continue to start each day eating right. If some days I fall into sugar, so be it. Because its a journey, a life. It's not a short term diet. No way. There is no finish line. You reach one goal, great. Set another one. Keep going. I started this endeavor to lose weight on January 1 this year, because I didn't want to be an obese nurse practitioner. I still don't want to be. And I still am. But I'm no longer morbidly obese, and it's possible, that I might be no longer even obese by summer if I would just keep making heathy choices. And keep swimming, biking and running. Ah yes, in the process this year I fell in love with triathlon. I'm not fast, but gosh darn if i don't just love it.

Carry on, peeps. Thanks for listening.